He who dares to teach must never cease to learn
Job Status: Employed

Got a job as a paraprofessional in the school where I student taught and am currently subbing at!!!!!!!!! 

So freaking excited / thankful / relieved / happy. 

The job is just for summer school, but I feel like this is the foot in the door I need. If anything, it will calm my crazy nerves and give me a good chunk of time to fully focus on my plans for the fall. 

:D 

Subsitute teaching three out of four of the days this week. Hopefully, this will keep my crazy mind occupied and ease the worry just a little bit. 

Seriously trying to figure out a summer school teaching job right now. I am not sure if I want to be a nanny for much longer.. 

Oh and ps. Happy 100th post on Tumblr to me!

Uhhhh

Job searching makes me feel a whole bunch of different emotions. And quite honestly its exhausting. 

First, you get really motivated and ready to tackle every thing on your to do list and email everyone you can and fill out every application that crosses your path. 

Then, you get excited with the possibility that you are actually that much closer to getting a real live job! Ooh, if this job comes through with this school system, than my life will be like this. Here comes the intense day dreaming. Not just about what grade you would teach, or what school system you would be a part of, but the really small details like what color your couch in your new apartment would be and where you would stop in the mornings to get coffee. 

The daydreaming goes on for far too long and far too in depth, as you find yourself running red lights and loosing sleep because of your hopeful wishing. 

Then, a couple days later, when nothing has magically landed at your feet (as planned!!) you go from thinking about every little detail of your life-to-be to sitting far too close to the edge of giving up in the matter of seconds. No emails have been returned, applications sit at a stand still, and you sit, wait, and worry throughout every minute of your current nannying job. As the three year old boy repeatedly hits you in the head with a stuffed animal penguin for about thirty minutes straight, you become numb and stop caring. Fine, I quit. I guess I’ll just be a nanny for the rest of my life. I make good enough money.

But its not about the money. And that’s where the real emotional roller coaster comes in. You don’t want a teaching job because of the money (or lack thereof) or because of the politics and test scores and overprotective parents or the budget cuts and the bad press, you want a teaching job because it is what you are meant to do. You want a teaching job because you truly believe in the children, and you care so much about them that you are willing to put up with all of the other nonsense, if you can just reach one student a day. You want to be a teacher because you know you can do it. And you worry because on paper, through the endless applications, you are not sure that they convey the depth of your passion. 

So, after rock bottom, you hit a plateu. A half-hearted trust in the bigger picture. And resort to all that is left: hope, and patience. 

A self portrait that best represents this post: 

Just sent out a bunch of cover letters and resumes to principals… I am nervous to check my email now until I have a job, haha. 

To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world better, whether by a healthy child or a garden patch…to know even one life was breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succedeed.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
I was going to rant, but this just exhausts me..

Budget cuts in the schools, sex offender teachers and students less prepared for college than ten years ago? (these were all headlines in today’s Washington Post)

Sick of the negativity and bad press - I even hear it from teachers in the school! If students see that you’re negative, then they will surely follow suit. Teachers need some real support, and we need it now before the best ones we have are burnt out and gone.

Okay, so I’ve applied to every surrounding county.

Now, I bother the principals directly.

What I did this past weekend… :)

What I did this past weekend… :)

Apply, Apply, Apply

and something will come through. 

Tonight is my graduation rehersal… weird!